Years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and many more years passed, on the legendary, Neerg Island. Many believed a certain magical carrot lay dormant...Until...

Don't give me too much rice: that's plenty

Sang the siren that was supposed to awaken Bob, who was warthogily snoring. On his few- blankets- on- the- floor- side, the Pumpkin had grown cute and furry. The Bog Monster flushed into the room. In the next room, Bob's mother, Bob, was also snoring, though slightly less warhogily.

The B.M.'s hyper sensitive hearing caused him to freeze, he could hear Top Gear hissing from a TV in another next room. Was Bob awake?

And then.

Inevitably.

The house catapulted a mushroom cloud into the sky.

Bugger

The bog monster stuttered into the big bosses office. The launcher of the clone program wasn't best pleased, and he couldn't imagine in his bravest fantasies his boss would be either.

It was because of this that he fell through the floor as he entered, and he was never seen again...

(at this point some appropriate dramatic music should be played / sung /preferably mimed.)

Black.

And then one finger piercing the barkness.

“IOHFUIO” cried a indistinguishable voice.

The bog monster didn't have a clue what was being said.

The dogs didn't either.

Taking the silence as his captive was not a vampire, or another creature of darkness, the being flicked the switch. The power savingless bulb pulsated into life.

At the sight of the bizarre voices source, B.M. Gasped , well, would of gasped but gasping through a gag is challenging.

The man standing infront of him looked like a carrot, but his body was bleached a ashy black, he had arms and legs. Obscuring his face was a gianormus, paper, mask.

It was unmistakably the magic carrot.

Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun.

An annotated extract from the tedious film 'Everyone's called Bob around here' the tape is from a questionable source, and is completely trashed after that.